The Start of Something Beautiful?
When a guy and a girl start to get closer and closer, until they share something special, is it the start of something beautiful? When does it cross the line and become something not so beautiful, something dangerous and worrying and potentially disastrous for both?
Its 5am and I'm sitting here with a glass of milk. While it would be a 'nice' thing to say I'm awake because of my concern for a very close friend, it isnt really the case - I had far too much caffeine last night. But lets pretend for the time it takes you to finish reading this post that I am, in fact, awake because of my concern for a friend. Whats there to be concerned about?
Okay, I'll tell you. A friend of mine, male, is developing a healthy friendship with another friend of mine, female. They're colleagues in a particular society at uni, and are both on the whole pretty coo people. So what? Well, heres the bit wherein people's views will differ vastly. This particular society is the Islamic Society, and she is the president.
Unfortunately, as President, shes gone and got things all screwed up for herself. In an attempt to be professional, shes absolutely defined herself as the president of the Islamic Society (ISOC). By 'defined herself', I mean nobody really knows her as anything else. Shes taken it, and herself, far too seriously. So nows stuck in a predicament, wherein she has to behave as is expected of her. And in a society like the Islamic Society, people seem to have very high expectations indeed.
Now in my opinion she can do whatever she wants. I'm not really close to her, and I'm not really bothered by what she does. But as any human being would be I'm a bit concerned by her well-being. If it were to get out that she were falling for or with a guy, it wouldnt do her well at all (that is the burden of high office).
Maybe I'm being a little paranoid, but is this not how it works? Girl in need of advice, or under stress, goes to guy for advice. Guy has sound advice. Girl goes to guy more often. Girl and guy start to talk on the phone late at night for quite a long time. At first phone calls tend to deal with issue at hand, but then they start to be about...well...anything. At this point, one or the other has to draw the line that defines their relationship. If they do, things can be salvaged and a close friendship can result. If they don't, one or the other will start to have ideas that may end in bliss or may end in disaster. Like I said, I may be over my head here, because its 2am. But maybe not. I'd appreciate some opinions on this issue.
Theres a third dimension to this as well. This friend of mine, hes already got a special someone. Now, this someone isn't his spouse or girlfriend or anything of the sort, just a really, really close friend. But I wonder what that close friend would think about this. And from my perspective, this really close friend is a REALLY close friend, undefined perhaps as a partner, but definitely a significant other. Maybe. But before you start accusing him of being a player, let me just say that I dont think he knows what hes getting into. I dont think hes 'interested' in this girl, from what I know it tends to be the girl who falls for the guy, and the guy who follows, usually when its too late to stop things. I think hes just being a supportive friend right now, or thinks he is.
So whats the best course of action, as a friend (me), to take? Watch it play out, or give some friendly advice to one or both of the parties involved? And if so, how?
Posted by illogicist at 9:14 PM