Wednesday, August 23, 2006


Everyone's had difficulty sleeping at one point or another in their lives. You'd think that eventually you get used to it, but I'm not sure you ever do. So for the past 2 hours I've been lying down, trying to fall asleep. And its almost funny, or would be funny if it wasnt so damn frustrating, how, when trying to fall asleep, you're never more awake.

So, 2am. Lie down. The room feels too bright tonight. Theres no more light than usual, all is dark except the light from the corridor outside, streaming in from under the door. But tonight it just feels a little brighter than usual. If I was smart, I would've taken it as a sign, a big neon sign that says YOURE GETTIN NO SLEEP TONIGHT BUDDY. But, of course, I think nothing of it. Turn so that my back is facing the light, and close my eyes.

And open my eyes. Click, click, click. Somethings clicking. Somewhere in front of me. What could it be? Is it my cat, sitting on the windowsill? Is she click-click-clicking her claws against the double-glazing? Is it the CD cases on my bed just a few inches away, sliding against each other as the bed moves under my breathing? Or is it something more sinister - a bogeyman, waiting for me to drift into unconciousness, so that he can crawl under the covers and dance on my bellybutton? Well, no such luck, Mr. Bogeyman, theres no sleep for me tonight.

Forget the clicking, turn the other way, you wont hear it. Except now the light is back in my eyes, and the sporadic crackling of my AC is bothering me. I contemplate turning it off, but that'd be pretty stupid, for obvious reasons. Wheres the cat. Is she still on the windowsill? I wish this light would just go away. Even with my eyes closed, its creating patterns under my eyelids. I could turn it off, but I'm supposed to be sleeping. And the more I move, the further I am from it.

And its funny how when you sleep, all your thoughts and worries and hopes flit through your mind, too slow to be ignored, to fast to hold on to. Some random thought will come, flirt with your consciousness, and be gone before you have time to grasp it, replaced by another flirtatious little tidbit.

Roll onto my back. Now I have the clicking of the CDs-slash-bogeyman on my right, and the crackling of the AC on my left. Maybe they'll cancel each other out. Counting sheep. What a good idea. It always works in the cartoons, right? The first few sheep (read: few thousand) are okay, but then they start to look like goats. Whats the difference between a sheep and a goat anyway? How can I not know? Maybe this is a good sign - maybe I'm falling asleep. Oh look, they're sheep again. Wait, no they're not, not anymore...what is that? Looks like some curious mix of the two. I wonder if thats possible. Can sheep and goats mate? Dammit, looks like I'm all out of sheep. Or goats. Shoats?

Time for another plan. Breathing exercises. Yes! This's worked before! Ok, so deep breaths. Deeeeeep breaths. Feel the tension leave your body. Breathe in...picture the air flowing through your limbs like water, filling every pore. Now breathe out, and with that water, expel all the tension. Let it all go. Now try alternating your breathing through your nostrils. Breathe in left. Breathe out right. Breathe in right. Breathe out left. Breathe in left...dammit, blocked nostril! WHY do my nostrils block randomly?

Open eyes. Get up. Turn off corridor light. Pick up book, read book, put down book, do situps, get tired, move CDs so that they stop making that horrible noise, get back in bed, close eyes, breeeeeaaaaaathe....

Click, click, click.

It's gonna be a long night.

Posted by illogicist at 4:23 AM


  1. Blogger Lym posted at 8/23/2006 09:38:00 AM  
    I feel ya man. It's 2:30 am and I have been on my bed since 11 am. It's not helping. I need to sleep. I've classes in the morning and I need to be alert!

    This is so frustrating, it's going to make me cry!
  2. Blogger Noors posted at 8/23/2006 11:50:00 AM  
    I feel ya!

    I've had my shares of sleepless nights! Glad I haven't had one of those in a while now..
  3. Blogger Arabian Princess posted at 8/23/2006 02:00:00 PM  
    This post reminds me of my sleepless nights during school days .. I would start counting sheeps, thinking if it will work and hearing every click on my surronding .. it was frustrating!

    good luck!!
  4. Blogger Samyah posted at 8/23/2006 05:07:00 PM  
    lol that was a nice, entertaining read..

    but hey, clicking is better than listening to people shouting nonsense from the bar across the street or idiot saudi guys who play their arabian guitar at 3am and live right under me :os
  5. Blogger illogicist posted at 8/23/2006 11:32:00 PM  
    Yeah AP, it seems lots of college students have insomnia at one point or another. Its probably stress-related. But alhamdulillah I've never had prolonged sleep problems...its usually just one or two nights, not weeks like some people I know.

    Yesterday was almost the same, for a while I was tossing and turning and started getting worried that I wouldnt be able to sleep. My stupid cat doesnt help either - shes decided to start sleeping in my room for the first time in...10 years? :s ugh.

    @samyah: lol, yeah that can suck. Clicking is pretty much all in the mind...unfortunately theres not much you can do to make saudi guitarristas disappear, short of throwing stuff at them, and well...might not have the desired effect. :p
  6. Blogger muscati posted at 8/24/2006 12:17:00 AM  
    I learned a long time ago that if I'm not asleep within half an hour of getting in bed then there's no use staying in it. I get out of bed and go do anything. Read, go online, watch a movie, whatever. But then again that was mostly in my college days and back then I could easily go a couple days without sleep. Nowadays I'd probably walk around like a zombie if I don't get at least 6 hours of sleep.
  7. Blogger Sree posted at 8/24/2006 11:58:00 AM  
    Just like Muscati, I get off my bed, watch tv... and depending on what I feel like, I'll either stuff myself or fool around with some weights while watching tv.

    Its a LOT worse when you have a badass headache and you can't go to sleep... even pills don't help. :S
  8. Anonymous Haq Islam posted at 8/31/2006 06:12:00 AM  
    Nice blog and cool design

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